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5) If the father of
the girl is an alim or pious and capable of performing
nikah, then he should himself solemnize the
marriage.
6) It is better to
give the Mahr Fatimi and one should endeavour to do so.
But if one does not have the means then there is nothing
wrong in giving less.
7) It is totally
un-lslamic for those who do not possess the means, to
incur debts in order to have grandiose
weddings.
8) It is fallacy to
think that one's respect will be lost if one does not
hold an extravagant wedding and invite many people. What
is our respect compared to that of Rasoolullah
(SAW)?
9) The present-day
practice of the intermingling of sexes is an act of sin
and totally against Sharee'ah.
10) There is
nothing such as engagement parties and mendhi parties in
Islam.
11) Great care must
be taken as regards to salah on occasions of marriage by
all - the bride, the bridegroom and all the
Participants.
12) It is
un-lslamic to display the bride on
stage.
13) The unnecessary
expenses incurred by the bride's family in holding a
feast have no basis in Sharee'ah.
14) For the engaged
couple to meet at a public gathering where the boy holds
the girl's hand and slips a ring on her finger is a
violation of the Qur'anic law of hijab.
15) It is
un-lslamic for the engaged couple to meet each other and
also go out together.
16) Three things
should be borne in mind when giving one's daughter gifts
and
presents at the
time of nikah:
i) Presents should
be given within one's means (it is not permissible to
take loans, on
interest, for such presents);
ii) To give
necessary items;
iii) A show should
not be made of whatever is given.
17) It is Sunnah
for the bridegroom's family to make
waleemah.
In waleemah,
whatever is easily available should be fed to the people
and care should be taken that there is no extravagance,
show and that no debts are incurred in the
process.
18) To delay nikah
after the engagement is un-lslamic.
Some
customs: In aping western
methods sheeplike. Muslims have adopted many customs
which are un-lslamic and frowned upon.
Some examples
are: Displaying the
bride on stage;
Inviting guests for the wedding from far-off places;
Receiving guests in the hall;
The bride's people incurring unnecessary expenses by holding a
feast which has no basis in Sharee'ah. We should remember that
waleemah is the feast arranged by the bridegroom after the
marriage is consummated.
It is contrary to Sunnah (and the practice of some non-Muslim
tribes in India) to wish, hope for or demand presents and gifts
for the bridegroom, from the bride's people. We should always
remember that our Nabi (SAW) did not give 'Ali (RA) anything
except du'a.
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